Happily Ever After

According to Jeffrey Eugenides' character, Madeleine Hanna, "the marriage plot" began with Jane Austen, and is a story involving  courting rituals, proposals and misunderstandings, and ultimately ending in marriage.  The plot then progressed through Henry James and Leo Tolstoy, to the point where the marriage is not a happy ending, but only the beginning of a relationship where the woman is hopelessly trapped.  By the beginning of the twentieth century, the marriage plot had died out.  In 2011, Eugenides brought it back, with a modern twist.

The Marriage Plot, as written by Eugenides, is set in the early 1980s on a college campus, and involving three key characters who are about to graduate.  The first is Madeleine, who is writing her thesis on the marriage plot, and hopes to become "a Victorianist." Madeleine romantically uses fictional characters as her role models, starting first with Ludwig Bemelmans' character with whom she shares a name.  Madeleine is in awe of Leonard, who grew up in Oregon, but now attends Brown with Maddy, and is very popular with the ladies.  Mitchell is another Brown student, who happens to be in love with Maddy, and wants to pursue a study of divinity.  Like Eugenides, Mitchell comes from Grosse Pointe, MI.  Eugenides' brings the marriage plot into the semi-modern day by playing the love triangle out in an era where women had opportunities to establish careers, live as successful single women, and when need be, divorce without social stigma.

Another twentieth century aspect of The Marriage Plot is that Leonard has been diagnosed with manic depression.  Maddy fell in love with him during a manic period, but he didn't realize his love for her until the depression took hold.  While all of Maddy's friends and family members warn her against trying to save Leonard, Maddy just can't help trying to rescue him from his illness.  Eugenides does a great job of showing the manic depression through its highs and lows, and the reader can sympathize with both Maddy and Leonard, and understand the challenges that their relationship will face.

It was a bit of a cop out for Eudenides to set his book about love after the women's movement in the eighties, even though it was published in 2011.  In the intervening years between the eighties and now, I would like to think that relationships and opportunities for women have changed.  On the other hand, maybe he is deliberately leaving the door open for him or another author to write the twenty-first century marriage plot. 

The Marriage Plot was a NYT Notable for 2011.  I'm counting this book for the Rewind, Audiobook, and I Love Library Books challenges.

Next up on CD:  The Cuckoo's Calling by Robert Galbraith

Still Reading:  American Woman by Susan Choi

Slowly Learning

 

Who's the Slow Learner:  A Chronicle of Inclusion and Exclusion is Sandra Assimotos McElwee's story of her son, Sean's progress from pre-k through twelfth grade.  Sean has Down Syndrome, and it was important to McElwee that his opportunities for an educational experience not be limited by a diagnosis.  As McElwee explains, Who's the Slow Learner is not a "how to" book, but a book about how she and her family did it.

McElwee lives in California, and her district's practice was to put all children with Down Syndrome into special classrooms.  McElwee wanted Sean to be fully included with his age appropriate classmates, and was very successful through 6th grade.  Once Sean hit 7th grade, his experience changed, not because of the fabled mean middle school kids, but because of adult bullies who were slow to learn just what Sean was capable of achieving.  My district is struggling with the issue of inclusion now as well, with some parents wanting their children to be fully included, and others preferring a more segregated setting.  Every child is different, and every district is different,  but the lessons that McElwee learned could be meaningful anywhere.

Each chapter covers a grade for Sean, and begins with his IEP (Individualized Education Plan) goals for that year.  Because the goals are supposed to tailored for each child, Sean's goals may provide some ideas for parents and districts, but are not something that can be cut and pasted into another child's IEP.  McElwee also provides verbatim copies of letters to and from district staff members, which were very fact specific, but provide good examples of how to effectively communicate your point, even if you are furious.  The rest of each chapter talks about Sean's experiences during that year. 

McElwee is Sean's biggest advocate, and she works hard to be sure that Sean is included in extracurricular activities as well as the classroom.  Sean is in plays, participates in choir, takes dance lessons, attends school dances, runs for student office, and manages the baseball team, all during his high school years.  When he can't participate in school activities for one reason or another, McElwee finds a group outside of school where he can be involved.  He even finds time to date a tv star, Becky from Glee.  This is California, remember.

The parent support group that I am involved with (www.FriendsofDifferentLearners.org) does a lot of the things that McElwee recommends, like having a buddy program, showing our teachers our appreciation, and working together with other parents of different learners.  I agree with McElwee that it is important for parents of different learners to be sure that the district knows them, and that they be involved with activities that parents of typical students are, such as the PTA.  One idea that I liked that McElwee suggested was a "Cool Club" for teenage different learners and those in their early 20s.  McElwee got 15 families together, and divided up the calendar.  Each family was in charge of coordinating an activity for the kids, for one weekend night, three times a year.  This could be mini golf, movies, a picnic, or whatever.  That way the kids always had something to do each weekend, like their typical peers. 

Although I don't have a child with Down Syndrome, I could still relate to McElwee's story.  Who's the Slow Learner is a must read for parents of children with Down Syndrome who are struggling with inclusion, and a should read for parents of children with autism or cognitive impairments who are facing the same challenges. 

Another idea for parents of different learners is to tackle this summer's reading list in audio form.   SYNC is a FREE summer program that gives away 2 audiobook downloads each week for the summer starting May 15 and ending August 14. SYNC audiobook titles are given away in pairs--a Young Adult title is paired with a related Classic or required Summer Reading title.  Check out the complete title list, including James Patterson's CONFESSIONS OF A MURDER SUSPECT and its pair partner, Agatha Christie's THE MURDER AT THE VICARAGE.  Visit www.audiobooksync.com to sign up for title alerts by email.

I received a free copy of Who's the Slow Learner from McElwee, and agreed to review it.  Other than that, no promises were made, and no payments were received.

Next Up:  American Woman by Susan Choi

Still Listening To:  The Marriage Plot by Jeffrey Eugenides

The Best Friend

Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend by Matthew Dicks is a story told from the perspective of an imaginary friend, Budo.  Budo's human friend is Max.  Max is an 8 year old boy who has autism.  Budo believes that he will only exist for as long as Max believes in him.  His life depends on Max's belief, but according to Budo, this does not make him any less real.  As he explains, an astronaunt who is tethered to a spaceship is not unreal just because he will die without the spaceship.

Max faces lots of challeges that children with autism often face, such as having a difficult time speaking with others, and being bullied.  Budo helps Max in those circumstances, which may account for Budo's unusually long life.  About half way through the story, Max and Budo begin their battle with a real life bad guy, and it is through this episode that Max shows his hidden strengths.

Budo has real insight into what makes a great teacher.  Mrs. Gosk is an amazing teacher because she loves the kids in her class, even the difficult ones, like Max.  She finds ways to keep the kids engaged, while not letting them get away with misbehavior.  Budo says that you can tell that Mrs. Gosk is a great teacher, because she is being a teacher, not acting like one.  He explains that teachers who don't really love their kids are play acting at teaching, and just doing a job to get through the day.  For an imaginary friend, he is pretty observant.

Memoirs is a very fast read.  Budo tells his story in a simple and straight forward voice, but he often repeats himself.  I think that this was intentional, given that Budo is only allowed to be as smart as a young child imagined him to be, but it did get a little old. 

I liked the idea of a society of imaginary friends who are able to interact with one another, and of imaginary friends appearing when people need them.  Budo clearly loves and understands Max.  In the end, Budo realizes that what Max's mom is always saying is really true - the right thing to do is usually the hardest thing.  But most of the time it's worth it. 

Memoirs was my first book for the 2014 Rewind Challenge.  It is also The Typical Book Group's book for this month, so I will have more to say about it after we meet in a couple of weeks.

Next Up:  The Love Affairs of Nathaniel P. by Adelle Waldman

Still (STILL) Listening To:  Winter of the World by Ken Follett 

Life Changing Summer Camp

While reading The Interestings by Meg Wolitzer I found myself constantly torn between wanting it to go on forever, and wanting to know what would happen next.  The adjective that is coming to mind is "lovely", but that sounds so unlike me.  Really though, The Interestings is a lovely, lovely book. 

It all started when my daughter's former art teacher suggested that she should go to a sleep away art camp.  I had never even considered that my daughter was qualified to attend an art camp, or that there was one for her, for that matter.  I told her teacher that I was so glad that he had recommended this, and that it could be life changing for her.  I wrote the deposit check, put a stamp on the envelope, and picked up a new book to start reading.  That book was The Interestings.

I went into The Interestings knowing that it was about a group of people who met when they were young and had high expectations, with the reader watching them grow up, and seeing the expectations adjust as plans change and sometimes fail.  I had assumed that it was going to be similar to The Emperor's Children by Claire Messud, where the people all meet in college.  Instead, the characters met at a life changing sleep away art camp.  And I was hooked.

Would my daughter's art camp be as important to her as Spirit-in-the-Woods was to these characters?  Would my daughter be more like the charmed and perfect Ash, or like the awkward and lovable but envious Jules?  Could she possibly be like Ethan, the true artistic genius who turns his creativity into a commercial success story?  And then later, please don't let her be like Ethan.  You'll see why.

In The Interestings, Ethan, Jules, Ash and her brother, Goodman, return to Spirit-in-the-Woods, the Utopian camp, each summer.  Their friends also include Jonah, who is the son of a famous folk singer, and Cathy, the talented dancer whose body lets her down.  These kids are driven, and they believe that they are special.  As they graduate from high school and outgrow art camp, they stay in touch as they try to find success in their fields.  Most of the story is set in New York City, where they all live after college.  We first meet the characters in the 1970s, then we progress through New York's aids infected 1980's, the dot com 1990s, and of course, 2001.  The story finally ends when the characters are in their 50s, and some of them are just hitting their stride.

There are some great quotes in this book, beginning with the author's dedication, "For my parents, who sent me there."   Maybe my daughter's art camp will inspire her to write a similar dedication to me someday . . . Note to self:  try to resist setting unrealistic expectations for summer camp.

In fact, although the book is primarily about this group of self obsessed friends, my favorite quotes all involve the family relationships.  The first is Ethan's haiku summary of the book that Ash thinks explains her life, "Drama of the Gifted Child":

"My parents loved me
narcissistically, alas
and now I am sad"

The next is Jules thinking about the relationship between Ash and Goodman:

"The love between a brother and a sister just over a year apart in age held fast.  It wasn't twinship, and it wasn't romance, but it was more like a passionate loyalty to a dying brand."  My kids are only 14 months apart, but they have not yet found that passionate loyalty.  Hopefully it will come with age.

Another great quote is Ash responding to a worried mom, who is concerned that her daughter won't find work as a director, and should try something safer:

". . .if she does really, really want it, and if she seems to have a talent for it, then I think you should tell her 'That's wonderful.'  Because the truth is, the world will probably whittle your daughter down.  But a mother never should."  I cried a little at that one.

Finally, Jules gives Ethan great advice about how to relate to his son who has autism:  "Love your son . . .Love him and love him."

The Interestings also fits into my "secret formula".  There are several books, like The Secret History by Donna Tartt and Special Topics in Calamity Physics by Marisha Pessl that follow a formula that I seem to fall for.  The formula involves a person going to a new school, and recognizing a coed clique that she wants to join.  Once the clique finally accepts the newcomer, she realizes that the group has a secret that she would be better off not knowing.  Usually a teacher is also involved.  The Interestings doesn't fit the formula perfectly, but it comes pretty close.  In The Interestings, Jules doesn't seem to realize that the clique exists until Ash invites her to join.  The secret comes later, and instead of being a secret from outsiders, this secret exists within the clique itself.  A counselor, instead of a teacher, is in on the plan from the start. 

There was so much that I loved about this book.  Each time that I thought that it was predictable and was falling into cliches, Wolitzer threw in a perfect twist to keep the story interesting.  There are so many more topics that I could talk about, like Jules' envy, Ethan's relationship issues, Goodman's arrogance, and Dennis' just plain goodness.  These are all characters who you should really get to know.  I'm adding this one to my growing list of Favorites.  The Interestings was a NYT Notable for 2013.

Next Up:  Memoirs of an Imaginary Friend by Matthew Dicks.  This is the next Typical Book Group pick.

Still Listening to:  Winter of the World by Ken Follett.  I've just reached the half way mark on this one, but the second half should go faster, now that the holidays are over and I'm back to my daily driving routines.

The Good Guys

When we first meet Benjamin Benjamin in The Revised Fundamentals of Caregiving by Jonathan Evison, his wife has left him and he has lost his children.  Because he had been a stay at home dad, he is also unemployed and in need of money.  He takes an adult education class in care giving, and decides to apply for a job as a caregiver for Trevor, a guy who is 19 years old, living with his mother, and suffering from muscular dystrophy. 

Like the mom in Me Before You by Jojo Moyes, Trevor's mom is more concerned about finding someone who her son will get along with than with finding the person most qualified to deliver professional care.  Right away, Trevor and Ben hit it off.  However, soon Ben's personal life gets in the way, and Trevor's mom fires him.  Through a series of clever notes and inevitable disasters, Trevor's dad convinces Trevor to come visit him in another state.  Next thing we know, Trevor and Ben have set off on a road trip. 

On their trip, Trevor and Ben find other lost souls in need of care giving, like Dot, a girl in her late teens who is trying to hitchhike from Tacoma to Denver, and Peaches, an enormously pregnant girl trying to change a flat tire in the rain.  To Ben's surprise, he begins to see that he actually is a mature adult, capable of finding and caring for the people who need him.  The next question is whether he can care for himself.

Although Trevor has muscular dystrophy, all he wants is to be treated like a normal guy.  While Trevor's substantial disability is never forgotten, it is clear that he is so comfortable around Ben, Dot, and Peaches because they see him as a person, not a person with a disease.  This is an especially timely book for the start of the Labor Day Weekend.  I have memories of watching the muscular dystrophy telethon every Labor Day Weekend when I was growing up, and this year I just might need to make a donation in Trevor's honor.

Judging a book by the cover, I expected Fundamentals to remind me of The Story of Beautiful Girl by Rachel Simon.  I could see the van in the picture, I knew that there was a person in a wheelchair, and I expected a cross country road trip to ensue.  But where Homan and Sam stole away on their trip and figured it out as they went along, Ben and Trevor are organized and full of plans.  There are some similarities with the road trip in Beautiful Girl, especially as Ben and Trevor pick up their assorted mix of traveling companions, but not as many as I expected.  When I read the first chapter, about Ben interviewing for the job of caregiver because he didn't think he could find any other job, I immediately thought of Me Before You.  But where MBY tended toward the sappy love story, Fundamentals is a story of guys growing into themselves by gently encouraging each other out of their comfort zones.

What I did not expect, was to be reminded of one of my favorite books of all time, Ready Player One by Ernest Cline.  Ready Player One is a science fiction story about a teenage boy, Wade Watts, living in the 2040s, and trying to win a potentially life changing video game based on trivia from the 1980s. My son just finished reading it, and also loved it.  When he was done, he asked me what other book is like it.  As far as I was aware, there was none.  So, I was thrilled when Ben's character reminded me so clearly of Wade's, even though their stories are so different.  Let me just say that if Wade Watts was living in 2012, and was in his early 40s at that time, he would be Benjamin Benjamin.  They both have the same dry humor, accidental hipster posture, and self deprecating manner that make them characters to root for.

I listened to Fundamentals on audio book, and it was read by Jeff Woodman.  I would listen to him read anything.  He had perfect voices for Ben, Trevor, and Dot, especially.  There were times when Ben's daughter, Piper, began to sound like Dot, but I think that may have been deliberate.

I first heard of Fundamentals when I read about it at River City Reading.  Thanks, Shannon!  I am sure to talk about it lots more in the months to come, and I plan to pick it for The Typical Book Group when we meet at my house.

So, without further adieu, Go. Get. It. And. Read.  God that feels good!  I haven't gotten to say that since January when I read (and loved) Gone Girl by Gillian Flynn. I'm adding Fundamentals to my list of Favorites, and giving it 5 stars on GoodReads.

Next Up on CD:  The Weight of Water by Anita Shreve

Still Reading:  The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay by Michael Chabon

Pluperfect Pieces

There are a lot of interesting pieces to talk about in The Last Life by Claire Messud.  Little pieces, that don't quite come together to make an interesting book, unfortunately, but interesting pieces, none the less.

The Last Life is blurbed as being "the story of teenage Sagesse LeBasse and her family, repatriated French Algerians.  It is set in colonial Algeria, the south of France and New England.  . . . When shots from the grandfather's rifle shatter an evening's quiet, their world begins to crumble . . . ."  OK.  Let's start with just that.  It took me until I was half way through the book to be certain that the hotel which Segasse's family owns is in France and not Algeria.  Admittedly, that may be due in large part to my lack of understanding of the conflicts between the native Algerians and the French.  This lack of understanding was central to the narrative, with Segasse's mom not understanding that there had been a conflict, and Segasse's grandparents not understanding what the conflict meant to Segasse's dad. 

Segasse's grandfather does shoot his rifle and injure people at the hotel, but the shooting is sort of a red herring.  It is a part of the story, but not the whole focus.   No one ever stops to ask why.  Why did the grandfather shoot the gun?  We don't know, and no one asks.  Why does Segasse's father betray the family?  No one asks.  Each person in the LeBasse family is so focused on their internal injuries and scars that they don't seem to  know the people around them.  The idea of family is emphasized by the characters as being of great importance, but time and again stories emerge of family members being cast aside for little reason or for no reason at all.

Segasse's brother, Etienne Parfait, is one of the interesting pieces.  Something happened during Etienne's birth that caused him to be deprived of oxygen for so long that he was left "severely mentally retarded", and confined to a wheelchair.  Messud does a great job of describing the challenges that a teenage Segasse would face in introducing her friends to her brother.  Segasse treats it as a privilege and a test to meet Etienne.  If her friends don't react well to him, they are out.  Segasse loves Etienne, and seems to realize that what happened to him could have happened just as easily to her.  She struggles with the question of what Etienne can actually understand, and with him growing older but not improving. 

Etienne leads to another interesting piece.  His name, according to Google Translate, means "Stephen Perfect".  Of course, when Segasse's parents named Etienne, they already knew that he would never be "perfect", but they stuck with the name that they had chosen.  Segasse calls him "plus-que-parfait", which she translates to "more than perfect" or "pluperfect".  Messud plays with the pluperfect tense throughout the novel.  At one point, she describes it as being "the tense where there had been a future", and by implication, where the future no longer exists.  This tense is applied to the LeBasse's life in Algeria, where they thought that their future was, but of course, it was not.  In Part Nine of the book, Messud writes whole chapters in the pluperfect, describing the brother that her father never had.  I like the idea of the pluperfect tense as Messud uses it, and marveled that anyone ever learns to speak English with all of the ridiculous tenses that I must use, but have never even heard of.   When I looked up the tense in Wiki and in Merriam Webster, I found that it just means "past perfect" (ex:  "had thought"), which is no where near as intriguing as "a tense where there had been a future."  I propose a new definition.

The last interesting piece is Messud's writing style.  The first thing that threw me was her love of the run on sentence.  Now I'm a lawyer, and I didn't think anyone liked run on sentences more than we do, but clearly I was wrong.  One that I noted (page 116, if you don't believe me) has 102 words, 12 commas, 4 semi colons, 1 colon, 1 set of parentheses, and finally, 1 period.  Yes, I noted this because it was long even by Messud standards, but it was not crazily different from any number of other sentences.  Messud also seemed to try to use words in their less common meaning.  For instance, she used the word "bluff" 4 times that I noticed in the novel, but never as either a fib or a geographic feature.  "He was bluff, but not convincingly so. . ."  " . . .my father's humor, easy, bluff, rolled into our evening. . . ."  I was tempted to buy the book on Kindle just so that I could search for certain words to see where and when they were used, but it wasn't available.

I have read The Emperor's Children, which is also by Messud,  but was written later.  Although The Emperor's Children wasn't one of my favorite books when I read it, there are two characters who are still with me.  The first is the pretentious Julius, who pretends that his only suit is his "signature suit", to explain why he is always wearing it.  The second is the lost Bootie, whose poverty in New York City, when finally discovered, is shocking to the self absorbed relatives who thought that they were supporting him.  I don't remember the run on sentences or the odd usage of words in this later book, and I'm not sure whether to attribute that to Messud's maturity, or her effort to use that style in The Last Life to create a voice for Segasse.  I will be interested to see if The Last Life sticks with me like The Emperor's Children has.

The Last Life was a NYT Notable Book for 1999.  It is also my penultimate book for the Off the Shelf Challenge.

Next Up:  Mother's Milk by Edward St. Aubyn

Still Listening to:  Fall of Giants by Ken Follett

Elephant in the Room

Me Before You by Jojo Moyes is a very moving book.  Will starts off as a high powered partner in a London financial firm, with a beautiful girlfriend and all the money he could want.  Unfortunately, he is injured in a motorcycle accident, and becomes quadriplegic.  Will cannot align his new self, who can only move his neck, face and one hand, with his old self, who as he says, had a very big life.  Even though his parents are wealthy, and are able to provide him with a motorized wheelchair, a handi-capable annex to their house, and a medical caregiver, he is not sure that life is worth living. 

In desperation, Will's mother, Camilla, decides to hire another caregiver to stay with Will full time.  The qualifications for this role are a little sketchy, and Louisa, who has never worked in home health care before, is surprised to get the job.  Camilla seems to feel that it is more important that Will be with someone who is chatty and optimistic than with someone who actually knows what to do.  Louisa needs the job, and accepts it with great hesitation, because she knows that she is not qualified.

Will and Louisa get off to a bumpy start, with neither of them sure what to say to the other.  Slowly, they work out a routine, and become comfortable with each other.  But then Louisa notices the elephant in the room.

In this case, that elephant is named "physician assisted suicide."  Moyes does a great job of showing this issue from all of its sides, and yes, there are more than two.  When I was a new attorney, I was at the Oakland County Courthouse during the Jack Kevorkian (aka Dr. Death) murder trial.  Kevorkian felt that people who were not able to commit suicide on their own, due to a physical inability to do so, should still have the right to die on their own terms and by their own hand, if they wanted to.  He equipped a special van, which if I remember correctly, the media called "The Death Mobile".  He would allow people to kill themselves in the van, after he hooked them up to his suicide machine.  Michigan quickly took away Kevorkian's medical license, and passed a law against assisting another person in killing himself.  Kevorkian didn't stop, and soon was charged with murder.

When I got to the courthouse (probably to file some completely unrelated probate paperwork), there were hundreds of people in wheelchairs there, holding signs.  As I hurried past them, a couple of the signs began to catch my eye, and I realized that these people were there not to support Kevorkian, but to support the prosecutor.  They wanted people to know that while they were disabled, and may even "qualify" for Kevorkian's services, they had lives that were worth living.  The extremists among them may have even felt that if the court decided that what Kevorkian was doing was right, their lives might be in danger, with public pressure to end it all.

Every character in Me Before You has an opinion about physician assisted suicide, but as the story goes on, most of those opinions begin to change.  Louisa tries to show Will all of the opportunities for a full life that are available to him.  At the same time, Will tries to convince Louisa that there is more to life than their small town, and the limited  prospects available there.

I listened to Me Before You in audio form, and wondered why there were so many people in the cast.  There was one main reader, who did the voice of Louisa, but also did the voices of the other characters that Louisa came into contact with.  But then, several of the other characters had chapters of their own, and different actors did the voices in those chapters.  What I found strange, was that Will didn't have his own chapter after the accident, even though he, more than anyone else, fought to have his voice heard.  Obviously, this was deliberate.

As I mentioned last week, all of the reviews that I read about this book mentioned how much the reader cried.  One would think that the novel was sponsored by Kleenex.  Call me heartless, but while I liked the story, I didn't cry.  There was one point where I was just on the verge of tears in my daughter's school parking lot, but then my daughter jumped into the car, plugged in her ipod, and Taylor Swift took over the airwaves.  It's surprisingly hard to cry when listening to Taylor Swift sing about crying.

Next up on CD:  The Lords of Discipline by Pat Conroy.  DREADING this one.  Hopefully I'll be pleasantly surprised.

Still Reading:  Sisterland by Curtis Settenfeld

Signs of Intelligence

One dark and rainy night, a widow, Martha, is sitting at home, when there is a persistent knock at her door.  She opens it to find an African American man and a white woman, wrapped in blankets and banners.  She lets them in, even though they don't tell her who they are or why they are at her house.  She gives them dry clothes, and is startled to find that they have a baby who they were hiding in their wraps.  Soon, the authorities are at her door, hauling the woman back to her "school", while the man runs off into the darkness.  The woman manages to whisper two words to Martha before she leaves:  "Hide her".  Martha promises that she will. And so begins The Story of Beautiful Girl by Rachel Simon.

The story starts off in 1968, and by the end of that year, the reader knows a lot more about Martha, the mysterious woman, Lynnie, and the man, Homan.  Lynnie was brought to the "school", which is actually an institution, by her family, when they felt that they could not handle her anymore.  Now we would call Lynnie intellectually or cognitively impaired, but in 1968, she was a "moron".  After witnessing horrors at the school, Lynnie stopped speaking, and no one seemed to notice.  Homan was born "normal", but lost his hearing after having a fever.  He learned sign language from some neighbors, but never learned to read or write.  He was found in an alley, assumed to be feeble minded since he couldn't speak, and taken to the "school".  Martha is a retired school teacher who thought that her days of learning were long past.  Her former students, who she has remained in touch with, help her to navigate her unexpected new life, as a grandmother.

Lynnie and Homan face incredible challenges over the next few decades due to their inability to communicate.  The world makes assumptions about them, but they each find advocates who help them to be heard.  Their advocates also help them to find their hidden talents, when they don't believe that they have anything worthwhile to contribute.

If Oprah was still picking books (is she?) The Story of Beautiful Girl would have the big O imprinted on the front.   It is destined for a Lifetime (or OWN) movie.  It is a little sappy, but still a sweet read.  I liked that some of the characters were based on real people, including one based on a young Geraldo Rivera.  There was an opportunity for a Water for Elephants ending, which I, personally, would have preferred, but the ending that Simon wrote will make a better movie.

There will be more about Beautiful Girl later in the month, when the Typical Book Group gets together to discuss it.

In other news, remember that card catalogue that I garbage picked in May?  Well, I have "after" photos for you. 

I refinished it, and gave it some legs.  Unfortunately, even with legs, it is a little too short for a coffee table.  So, I am thinking that I will put a cushion on the top, and make it into a window seat instead.

It seems to be just the right height for that.  If only it was a little more cushy. . .

Next up on CD:  Mrs. Kimble by Jennifer Haigh

Still Reading:  Year of the Gadfly by Jennifer Miller

The Book Group Reports

Last night, The Typical Book Group got together to talk about Dogs of Babel by Carolyn Parkhurst.  There were 7 of us there, and everyone had read the book, although our most timid reader skipped the "scary parts".  In fact, there are not really any scary parts in the horror movie sense in DOB, but there were times when the reader was worried that Paul would do something stupid.

One thing that we talked about a lot was why Paul, who was highly educated, didn't see more of Lexy's demons, and get her help.  We decided that Paul had co-dependent tendencies.  Mid discussion, we found ourselves confused about whether the ex-wife was an alcoholic in this book, or in 11/22/63 by Stephen King, which we discussed last month.  We even joked about changing the name of our group to "The Alcoholic Ex-Wives", which is only funny because none of us are ex-wives.   There's no need to jinx ourselves, so I don't see a name change in our immediate future.  However, the correct answer is that the ex-wife was an alcoholic in 11/22/63, and an obsessive compulsive control freak in DOB.  No danger of me catching OCD, that's for sure.

We also questioned if a person could actually die from falling from even the highest branches of an apple tree.  We realized that Lexy had to fall from a fruit tree so that there could be a plausible reason for her climb, but we couldn't think of a fruit tree that grows very high, other than a palm tree, which would be hard to climb, and harder to find in Virginia. 

Next month we are going to read The Story of Beautiful Girl by Rachel Simon.

To add to this jam packed week, The Friends Book Group met tonight.  There were only 3 of us there, unless you count the host's husband and son, who also participated.  All 5 of us loved the book, which tells me that 100% of readers agree, Ready Player One by Ernest Cline is a great read.  We spent most of the time talking about our favorite parts. 

You might recall that The Friends Book Group is made up of people who are members of a support group for parents and friends of different learners.  At the most recent meeting of the support group, we had a speaker in to talk about cyber addiction and its effect on kids with ADHD.  This topic was completely on point for Ready Player One.  The speaker addressed the addictive nature of massively multiplayer online games.  There could not possibly be a more addictive massively multiplayer online game than the Oasis, as described by Cline.  Our speaker warned about kids who have good friends who they play online games with, but who they may not have ever met in real life.  This was one of the issues that Wade faced in RPO.  He trusted those who he met online more than his relatives, and with good reason.  Perhaps the future is bright for our kids with ADHD who spend too much time playing video games, if Cline's predictions come true.

Given the consistent low attendance with this group, I think there is a good chance that this was the last meeting of this group. I mean really, if people won't come out to discuss Ready Player One  what will they show up for?  If there is a next meeting, you can be assured that I will post about it.

Still Reading:  The Lotus Eaters by Tatjana Soli  This one is going slower than I expected.  Hoping for it to pick up soon.

Still Listening to:  World Without End by Ken Follett.  I'm on disc 24 now - 2/3 of the way through . . . still interested.

Translit Trip

Who, What, Where, When and Why.  This is what you need to know, right?  Gods Without Men by Hari Kunzru dodges these questions, while weaving an interesting story. 

Who:  There is quite a cast of characters in Gods, including animals who were men, men who were named for animals, people who believe that they can communicate with aliens, and most importantly, Jaz, Lisa, and their son, Raj, wealthy New Yorkers who have lost their way. 

What:  Well, I'm not quite sure.  At times the characters are people innocently looking for enlightenment.  At other times, they appear to be a cult.  Some of the characters are just looking for a vacation.  Others for the answer to all of life's questions.

Where:  Another good question.  All of the characters are bound together by "Pinnacle Rocks."  However, the Pinnacle Rocks in the story, while said to be in a National Park, don't seem to be part of the Pinnacles National Monument in California.  Kunzru's Pinnacle Rocks involve three points, blatantly like a holy trinity.  The characters all feel a need to be near the rocks, even if they are not sure why.  When flying to Kunzru's rocks, one would fly into Las Vegas.  Due to their attraction to aliens, they seem to be closer to Area 51 than Los Angeles.

When:  That's an easy one.  1947, 1778, 1958, 1920, 1970, 1871, 1971, and 1775, in that order, but with chapters from 2008 and 2009 alternated between the other years. 

Why:  Hmmm.  Several of the characters, especially the twentieth century characters, are drawn to the rocks and the group that surrounds them by a desire to communicate with aliens.  The earlier characters are on missions to explore the territory, but find strange things.  The characters from 2008 and 2009 are running away, with nowhere to go, and find themselves at the rocks.

Much of the story focuses on Jaz, Lisa, and Raj.  Raj has autism, which has shifted the entire focus of the family from the pursuit of happiness to just getting through the day.  Jaz is Indian and Lisa is Jewish, but they don't think that makes any difference in their relationship until they face an unexpected challenge, and both turn to people of their faith to confide.

I read Gods Without Men after reading THIS review in the NYT.  I was really interested in the new genre that the critic/author, Douglas Coupland, describes as "Translit".  Per Coupland, "Translit novels cross history without being historical; they span geography without changing psychic place.  Translit collapses time and space as it seeks to generate narrative traction in the reader's mind. . . With Translit, we get our delicious cake, and we get to eat it, too, as we visit multiple pasts safe in the knowledge we'll get off the ride intact, in our new perpetual every-era/no-era."  Sounds great, doesn't it?  If I had read THIS NYT Review instead, I would have skipped it.  It's hard to believe that the two reviewers are even talking about the same book, let alone in the same Times.

The briefest summary of Gods, and again, in Coupland's words, would be this:   "People come and go, damage is done, people return and some vanish".  While I certainly don't regret reading Gods, I probably won't frequently recommend it.

And my friends, that completes the Support Your Library Challenge.  24 books from my library read or listened to (so far) this year.

Half Time Report:  I am now on disc 18 of the 36 CDs that make up World Without End by Ken Follett.  I am really enjoying listening to it, and am in no rush to finish.  So far, much of the drama has centered on whether or not a new bridge should be built, and if so, who should build it, who should pay for it, and who should get the tolls.  Sounds pretty boring and 14th century doesn't it?  Not if you live in Metro Detroit!  Right now, a businessman named Matty Moroun, and his Ambassador Bridge Company are waging what appears to be a multi-million dollar campaign to try to keep the State of Michigan from building a new bridge to Canada, so that he can build it instead.  Either Governor Snyder or Matty Moroun should read World Without End to get some tips on how to be conniving and persuasive.  Follett even has a character named Matty, but right now she's in hiding after being accused of being a witch.  Snyder might be wishing he could take Moroun out of the action with an accusation like that about now.

In Other News:  Yep, it's that time again.  I just ordered my Thanksgiving turkey today.  Click on this link to understand why this has anything to do with reading or not running!

Next up:  The Lotus Eaters by Tatjana Soli

Lions, and Gorillas and Asperger's, Oh My!

Three Weeks in December by Audrey Schulman is a great summer book, and I'm not sure why more people aren't reading it!  I almost skipped it myself, because I though it sounded too much like State of Wonder  by Ann Patchett.  Like State of Wonder, Three Weeks is about a woman researching new medicines in a jungle.  But really, the similarities end there.

Three Weeks alternates between the story of Max, the woman referenced above, which is set in 2000 and the story of Jeremy, an engineer who is trying to build a railroad bridge, which is set in 1899 and 1900.  Both Max and Jeremy are from Bangor, Maine, and both travel to Africa for their work.  Max and Jeremy face the challenges of Africa in their times, and find themselves acclimating more than they expected.

When we read State of Wonder, the Friends Book Group discussed whether or not the character, Dr. Swenson, had Asperger's Syndrome.  I, personally, ruled out Asperger's, and declared her a psychopath.  In Three Weeks, Max is open about the fact that she is "an Aspie".  She has spent a lifetime studying the behaviors of  typical people, who she calls "normals", in order to figure out what she should do in every situation.  Max's mom has helped her to fit in, while accepting her as she is.  There is one touching scene in which we hear that since Max can't hug people, when she wants to hug her mom, they sit near each other on the couch, each hugging the other's empty winter coat.  Schulman does a great job of explaining Aspergers though Max's actions, and Max's declarations to others.  In that sense, this book had a little of the feel of Still Alice by Lisa Genova, where Genova educated the reader about early onset Alzheimer's.  For Max, her Aspergers' becomes an advantage when she begins to study the gorillas who are said to chew on the plant that she came to Africa to find.

Jeremy's story starts off as a story of American arrogance, reminding me of The Poisonwood Bible by Barbara Kingsolver.  Like the father in Posionwood, Jeremy is certain that if he could just bring enough American tools, techniques, and determination to Africa, the continent could be transformed.  As with the father in Poisonwood, the jungle fights back, establishing itself as a force to be reckoned with.  Jeremy also struggles to fit in with society, both in the US and Africa, and occasionally looks a little "Aspie" himself. 

In Max's time, there is a group of child soldiers, called the Kutu, who are armed with weapons, and rumored to be cannibals.  Throughout the story, they are constantly creeping closer and closer to Max's research station.  In Jeremy's time, there are man-eating lions who are hunting and eating his workers.  Jeremy becomes an unlikely hunter, but is also aware that the lions are on his trail.  The reader is always wondering whether both Jeremy and Max, one of them, or neither of them, will make it out of Africa alive.

All told, Three Weeks in December is a page turner, full of action and ethical issues.  It would be a great book group book, because even at the end there is a lot to discuss.

That's one more down for the Support Your Library Challenge!

Next up:  The Grown-Ups by Victoria Glendinning

Still Listening to:  Change of Heart by Jodi Picoult.  I am liking this one much more than I expected!  You'll hear more about it soon . . .

Accumulated Memories

"History is that certainty produced at the point where the imperfections of memory meet the inadequacies of documentation."

This quote, which the character, Adrian, credits to French historian, Patrick Lagrange, is the centerpiece of Julian Barnes' book, The Sense of an Ending.  The story starts with four friends in high school in England, all with the sense that one of them, Adrian, is inherently superior to them in some unknowable way.  Another of them, Tony, tells the story through his eyes, and through the imperfections of his memory.  Tony's tale is that of the friends drifting apart, of Adrian's failure, and of long past betrayals.

Forty years later, the death of a minor character and the unexpected bequest that she leaves to Tony, cause him to question what he thought he knew about Adrian.  As an estate planning attorney, I love the story of a strange and unanticipated gift in a will.  Tony soon learns, however, that an old girlfriend, Veronica, is holding on to the item that he is supposed to receive, with no intention of turning it over to him.

Veronica shows Tony a side of himself that he had forgotten existed, by sending him a copy of a letter that he had sent to Adrian.  The letter is full of venom and curses, which Tony had forgotten writing.  Tony's words from his youth came true in ways that he never thought possible.  When I was in high school, a boy who I knew told a girl who I knew to go to hell one Friday.   They weren't arguing, it was just something that he said.  The next day, the girl was killed in a plane crash, and the boy was devastated, feeling that he had condemned her.  This is exactly Tony's position, only he didn't realize that his curse might have had any effect until decades had past.

The reviews of The Sense of an Ending are all written in a sort of code, so as not to give the ending away.  In fact, I didn't see the ending coming, and was furious with Barnes, with only a few pages to go, for his treatment of different learners and their families.  I'll discuss this further on my Spoilers Page, for anyone who is interested.  My opinion changed when Tony realized that it wasn't his curse, but the advice that he gave to Adrian that lead to the final results.  I think that it will take some time for me to really think this book through.  I also admit that if I hadn't allowed myself to be sidetracked by my perception of prejudice, I may have found the book more powerful.

Adrian was concerned with what he called "accumulations", which he explains in horse racing terms as bets that roll on the profits from one horse's win to increase the bets on a later horse. The book ends with the statement "There is accumulation. There is responsibility. And beyond these, there is unrest. There is great unrest."   It will all make perfect sense, when you get to the end.  What Tony forgot, with all of his focus on Adrian's clever words, is that history repeats itself.

The Sense of an Ending won the 2011 Man Booker Prize, and was a NYT Notable Book.  At just 163 pages, it was a fast read, and very heavy, without being difficult.

That's one more down for the Support Your Library Challenge!

Next up:  New American Haggadah by Jonathan Safran Foer and Nathan Englander

Almost Done Listening to:  The Russian Debutant's Handbook by Gary Shteyngart

Food for Thought

After reading Eating Animals by Jonathan Safran Foer, I decided that while I was not yet ready to become a vegetarian, I was willing to commit to making more conscious decisions about the meat that I would eat.  This led me to buy a 1/4 cow.  Once we had eaten all of the steaks, I started looking for ideas of what to do with the cuts of meat that I had never heard of before.  Like cube steak.  This led me to The Pioneer Woman. 

The Pioneer Woman, aka Ree Drummond, hosts a great website full of recipes, like this one for Marlboro Man's Favorite Sandwich, which has cube steak as the main ingredient.  If you have not checked out her blog, seriously, click on the link above, and do it now.  What I like about her is that she talks in a friendly voice, and includes pictures of every single step, so that you cannot get anything wrong.  At least theoretically.  I found a few favorite recipes on her website, and check back to it from time to time.  In fact, you might notice that there is a link to her website at the bottom right hand side of this blog, so if you are ever wondering what Ree is up to, you can click to her through me.  Yeah, we're pretty tight.

After enjoying the Pioneer Woman's blog, I bought myself her cookbook, The Pioneer Woman Cooks:  Recipes from an Accidental Country Girl for my husband to give me for Christmas.  I was thrilled that it was just like the blog, with lots of pictures of the food items, and of Ree's family.  The book had two disappointments for me though:  1) I tried making her flat apple pie, three times, and it always leaked and stuck to the pan; and 2)  my favorite of her recipes, spaghetti and meat balls, wasn't in the book.  The spaghetti problem was solved when my birthday rolled along, and my sister-in-law bought me Ree's second cookbook, The Pioneer Woman Cooks:  Food from my Frontier, where she included the spaghetti recipe, but used rigatoni instead.  Still no luck on the apple pie.  But my sister-in-law also got me Ree's memoir, Pioneer Woman:  Black Heels to Tractor Wheels - - A Love Story.

In the meantime, Ree started doing a show on the cooking channel, which I DVRed, and sometimes watched.  I found that I liked Ree much better in writing than on TV.  She just seemed to have more personality in her blog than what came through on TV.  So, I put off reading the memoir, thinking that maybe I was over her.

Pioneer Woman:  Black Heels to Tractor Wheels is the story of Ree meeting and falling in love with her husband, who she calls "Marlboro Man".  I was sort of unimpressed with the premise - did I really want to read someone's true love story?  I mean, if it was William and Kate's, I'd read it for sure. And I have read Henry VIII and Anne's love story countless times.  But the love story of a contemporary blogger?  After the first 50 pages, I was hooked.  In fact, I'm thinking that the next time I'm really frustrated with my husband, I should sit down and write the story of how we met and fell in love.  If nothing else, it would probably help me to feel a little more forgiving.

One of my favorite characters in Ree's true story is her brother, Mike.  While she never says what it is about Mike that makes him a different learner, my guess is Down's Syndrome.  The story of Mike, and how he reacts to the changes in Ree's life, such as telling everyone in a mall that she is getting married, is hysterical.  There is a group home near my house with 5 developmentally disabled adult men living in it, and I could imagine each of them reacting to news of a sibling getting married in a similar way.  Begin the sibling of a different learner can be a tough row to hoe.   Ree gets flustered by Mike's demands and expectations, but loves Marlboro Man even more when she sees how well he treats her brother.  I don't recall any mentions of Mike in the cookbooks, but I think I will go back and check out some of her shows that I DVRed and never watched to see if he makes an appearance.

Another great thing about the book is that at the end, Ree includes the recipes for most of the meals that she mentions in the story. I liked that about the last book that I reviewed, Bridge of Scarlet Leaves by Kristina McMorris too, so I've decided to add a new tag - "Recipes Included". 

Black Heels to Tractor Wheels ends just after Ree's first child is born.  I was expecting to hear more of the story of how she started blogging, why she decided to home school, and how she got so great at photography.  The point of the title, if not the book, was to illustrate what a huge change it was for Ree to move from her posh life in the suburbs to Marlboro Man's Ranch, but I can't imagine her any place else.  If a "Book 2" comes out, I will be sure to pick it up.

Next Up:  The Night In Question:  Stories by Tobias Wolff

Still Listening To:  The Russian Debutante's Handbook by Gary Shteyngart

The Typical Book Group Report - 6

Tonight 9 Typical Book Groupers got together to discuss The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins.  Mind you now, we are a group of moms who read.  In that order.  Moms first, readers second.  Several of the book groupers had refused to read Hunger Games for years, because they could not imagine how a book about children fighting to the death on television could be worth reading.  But after giving it a chance, we all loved it.

Basically, The Hunger Games is a book about children forced to fight for their survival, as part of a reality TV show.  The children are selected lottery style from the 12 districts surrounding the Capital.  The people in the districts are poor, and the people in the Capital are wealthy.  For instance, the people in the districts are frequently cold and starving, while the people in the Capital are all about plastic surgery and outrageous outfits.  The main characters are Katniss, Peta and Gale who are all from District 12.

What makes the story bearable is that Collins imagines it so well.  It seems almost conceivable that if we aren't careful, something like this could happen in the future.  We are obsessed with reality TV.  We constantly thrive to make the challenges more difficult on shows like Survivor and Wipe Out.  How far could we really be from a reality TV "star" dying on camera?

One issue that we discussed tonight was who, in today's terms, is playing to the role of the Capital residents, and who is playing the people in the districts.  Most of the book groupers thought that the U.S. is like the Capital, where medicine, food, and plastic surgeons are readily available, with the other less wealthy countries playing the role of the districts.  Being more politically jaded, I have to wonder if maybe the Capital is "the 1%", and the people in the districts are the rest of America.

Another debate that we had was how old our kids should be before they should be allowed to (1) read the book and (2) see the movie.  Both of my kids, who are in 12 and 13, have seen the movie.  My son and I read the book together when he was about 10.  Although I have not seen the movie, those who had indicated that some of the most violent scenes from the book were only alluded to in the movie.  I think that as a group, we would draw the line for seeing the movie somewhere around 6th or 7th grade.  As for reading the book, we agreed that 3rd grade is a little young, but seemed to think that 4th or 5th grade could be OK.

On a related note, my daughter, who I never thought would be interested in The Hunger Games saw the movie, and loved it, so she saw it again.  Now she is reading the second book, Catching Fire.  As the parent of a young child with dyslexia, parents of older dyslexic kids told me time and again that some day my child would find a book that she loves, and that would make all the difference in her reading.  I have tried everything to get her to find that book.  It turns out that all it takes is a hot guy.  After seeing Josh Hutcherson in the movie, her interest was piqued.  Last night, we got to a critical part in Catching Fire, and I told her that I wasn't going to read any more.  She wound up staying awake and reading for another hour and a half.  We joked that I never thought I would have to tell her that she can't stay up all night reading, but I did last night.  And now, the only thing that I worry about is that she is going to get through all of the books too fast!  If only she had fallen for Harry Potter -  his stories are a lot longer and there are more of them!

Next up:  Next we are going to read Sister of My Heart by Chitra Banerjee Divakaruni

Still Reading:  Moby Duck by Donovan Hohn

Still Listening to:  Winter's Tale by Mark Helprin.  Have I mentioned that I am loving this book?

Ethical Lessons from 13 Year Old Boys

Last night, with one chapter left to go in Black Swan Green by David Mitchell, I made myself stop reading it.  I was afraid that if I finished it, I would never get to sleep because I'd have so many thoughts about the story swirling in my head.  However, if I knew I'd be able to read the last chapter in the morning, I could try to "sleep fast"** to get there.

The main character in BSG is Jason Taylor, a 13 year old boy growing up in rural, but upper middle class, England.  Jason has a stammer, which he explains is different from a stutter.  Taking place over the course of a year, Jason's social status fluctuates, with him being a king for a few precious days, and a pariah for most of the others.  He is tormented by bullies, but finds the strength to get through. 

Jason's relationship with his family is also strained.  His parents are going through a rocky patch in their marriage, and his sister is getting ready to go off to college.  The inability of a family to communicate with each other is one of my favorite themes, and Mitchell conveys this tension like one who knows it well. 

I have three favorite quotes from BSG, all from the chapter titled "souvenirs".

First is this, where Jason is talking to a woman in an antique store:
Jason:  "You don't know my parents"
Woman:  "The question here is, 'Do you'"
Jason:  "Of course I do.  We live in the same house."
Woman:  "You break my heart, Jason.  Oh, you break my freakin' heart."

The second is Jason, after watching his mom stop shoplifters in her store: 
"I noticed a new need that's normally so close-up you never know it's there.  You and your mum need to like each other.  Not love, but like."

The last is Jason, immediately after deciding that he likes his mum:
"Good moods're as fragile as eggs."
"Bad moods're as fragile as bricks"

As I was reading BSG,  I was really liking it, but it was reminding me of another book that I had read, and I just couldn't place which one it was. Finally, it came to me - The Wednesday Wars by Gary Schmidt.

The Wednesday Wars is a children's book, which won Newbery Honors.  I first read it to my son when he was in 4th grade.  My son loves it when a book that I am reading to him makes me cry, and Wednesday Wars did a couple of times.  It's strange though, that Black Swan Green would remind me of a children's book.  My sister bought BSG for me, saying that it was one of her favorites, and her taste is generally (and in all things) much more sophisticated than mine.

Black Swan Green is set in rural England, in 1982, the year of the war in the Falkland Islands.  It is the story of one year in the life of a 13 year old boy, Jason Taylor.  Jason secretly writes poetry and is terrified that his "friends" will find out and make fun of him.  Jason's friends already make fun of him because of his stammer, which sometimes keeps him from saying certain letters.  Adults reach out to Jason to encourage his poetry and give him hope that the bullies won't win in the end.  Jason sees hypocrisy in the adults, including his parents, who want to keep gypsies from settling in their area.  Jason lives with his parents and his older sister.  Through the story, his parents' marriage disintegrates, and his relationship with his sister shows signs of strength.  The author has said that the story is semi-autobiographical.

The Wednesday Wars is set on Long Island, in 1967-68, during the Vietnam War.  It is the story of one school year in the life of a 13 year old boy, Holling Hoodhood.  Holling secretly acts in a Shakespeare play, and is terrified that his friends will find out and make fun of him.  Some kids in the school already bully Holling, and he is singled out for being Presbyterian in an otherwise Catholic and Jewish town.  Adults reach out to Holling to encourage his love of Shakespeare, and to compensate for a lack of attention paid to him by his parents.  Holling sees hypocrisy in adults who are mean to Vietnamese refugees.  Holling lives with his parents and his older sister.  Through the story, his parents' marriage shows signs of cracking, and his relationship with his sister becomes a lifeline to them both.  The author has said that the story is semi-autobiographical.

So, what makes one of these a critically acclaimed children's book, and the other a critically acclaimed book for adults?  The line is really not so clear.  I read Wednesday Wars to my son when he was in 4th grade, and to my daughter when she was in 6th.  The Typical Book Group also read it, after so many of us were talking about reading it with our kids.  Now my son is 13 and in 8th grade, and I think he's ready for Black Swan Green.  He is definitely mature enough for the content, but I'm not sure that he's ever read a book set in England with so many British phrases.  It might get frustrating for him to not know that "nick" means "steal" or that "snogging" is good, but he is very close to being ready for it.  Ready for reading the book I mean, not for snogging.

In both books, the 13 year old boys face ethical challenges that would be difficult for adults to manage.  The boys show their character, and do what is right, even when they really want to do the opposite. 

I guess my point is, if you liked Black Swan Green, and you have kids who are in 4th-7th grade, buy them The Wednesday Wars.  If you read The Wednesday Wars with your kids and you loved it, you will also love Black Swan Green.  I loved Black Swan Green, will add it to my Favorites list, and am looking forward to reading Cloud Atlas by Mitchell, which my sister also gave to me.

My favorite quote from The Wednesday Wars is this:
After Holling's sister returns home after a failed trip to California
Dad, to sister, very sarcastically:  "Did you find yourself?"
Sister, unbelieving: "What?"
Dad:  "Did you find yourself?"
Holling:  "She found me."

I can only hope that some day, my kids who fight daily over issues of such importance as who gets to sit in the front seat, will find each other too.


**My mom used to tell me to "sleep fast" when I was little.  I know right?  How does one sleep fast?  It usually meant that something great was going to happen in the morning, and that I needed to get to sleep quickly in order to get enough sleep to wake up early in the morning to enjoy it.  Like "we're going to Disney World in the morning, sleep fast!"  I also always thought that it was a wish that the night would go by quickly so that the morning could come sooner.  I tell my kids to "sleep fast" now, and they know what I mean.  It's strange, the things you do, that your parents did, that you never planned to do.

One more down for the Off the Shelf Challenge!

Next up:  March by Geraldine Brooks

Still Listening to:  Following Atticus by Tom Ryan

The Friends Book Report - 4

The Friends Book Group met to discuss State of Wonder by Ann Patchett last night.  We all agreed that we were surprised that we liked the book as much as we did.  I mean really, who would expect a book about a scientist who is trying to develop a fertility treatment to be a page turner?  But it was. 

As always, we couldn't resist trying to diagnose the characters.  Some of us thought that Dr. Swenson had Asperger's.  Some of us thought that Marina was pregnant.  We actually spent quite a lot of time talking about whether Marina was pregnant or not, and then trying to figure out what the characters would do (after the book ended) if she was.  It had not occurred to me that Marina was going to have a baby, but it seemed totally obvious to others, and it would explain why Marina did something that I didn't quite understand toward the end of the book. 

Predictably, we talked a good deal about why someone would want to have kids at 70 years old.   We also wondered what the impact on the global population would be if this could be done.

We decided to read Following Atticus:  Forty-Eight High Peaks, One Little Dog, and an Extraordinary Friendship  by Tom Ryan next.  However, some of us have already read that one.  The people who have are going to read a different dog book, The Story of Edgar Sawtelle by David Wroblewski instead.

Still Reading:  Lulu in Marrakech by Diane Johnson

Still Listening to:  Helen of Troy by Margaret George

Dyslexic Success

As a parent of a child who has dyslexia, I try to read a lot on the subject.  However, I have stopped buying every book about dyslexia that I see, as some are just not all that helpful.  As a result, I checked The Dyslexic Advantage:  Unlocking the Hidden Potential of the Dyslexic Brain by Brock Eide out from my library on audio book.  By the time I had reached the 3rd of the 7 discs, I had ordered the book from Amazon.

My daughter has struggled with dyslexia for years.  We were very lucky to have her diagnosed when she was in first grade.  Most dyslexic students are not diagnosed until third or fourth grade.  Since that time, we have worked with tutors, tried to find the best accommodations for her in public school, and most recently, moved her to a private school for children with learning disabilities.  In fact, it was my frustration with one of her teachers in the public school that set me off on a rant and got me blogging.  So in a way, I have to thank dyslexia for leading me to blog!

My frustration was that no matter what we tried for my daughter, she would master a certain skill, and then later, would completely forget it.  As an example, in preschool she could easily count to 20.  In kindergarten, she consistently omitted the number 14, as though it never existed.  Same thing with simple words that don't sound out, and math facts.  She would know them all, so her teachers would move on, only to realize a month later that she had forgotten what she once knew.  For 3 years we had her tutored at a reputable dyslexia center in our area.  In the end, she really hadn't made that much progress.  The tutor, who was in charge of the center and the most qualified person there, said that she had never before had a student who would grasp a concept and then lose it.  In exasperation, I have taken to referring to that place as "The Center for the Mildly Dyslexic" which is unfair and mean spirited of me, but whatever.  I was led to believe that my daughter is the only dyslexic person like this, and that it is probably something other than dyslexia that is causing her to forget. 

Imagine my surprise when Brock Eide mentioned in one of the very first chapters that a common type of dyslexic learner is just like my daughter, and has a hard time holding onto the concepts that he or she has apparently mastered.  This was only one of the insights that Eide shared which I had never heard before. 

I sort of expected The Dyslexic Advantage to be a list of successful people, with the generalized encouragement that your child too could succeed in these areas.  It is far more than that.  Eide does look at successful people, and uses them as examples, but his emphasis is not on what they have accomplished, but on what caused them to think in a way that allowed them to find success.  Eide explains that there are many different ways that people who have dyslexia think (it's not all the same!), and classifies them based on the ways that they can learn and solve problems.  He identifies four brain variations common among people with dyslexia, and discusses the challenges and strengths of each. 

What The Dyslexic Advantage  is not is a users' manual for parents.  It clarifies that dyslexia is not a "one size fits all" affliction, and that each individual needs to be analyzed to see how they learn best.  Most of the people in Eide's examples did not find success until they were well out of high school, and still struggling with different learning techniques.  When they were finally able to figure out what worked right for them, the success followed.  However, this was generally after years of trial and error.  There is not a prescription here for parents to follow, other than that we should be open minded, encourage our children's strengths, and see if those strengths can be leveraged into a learning advantage.

One issue that I have debated with myself over the years is whether I am actually helping my daughter by getting her help.  When we look at lists of successful people who have dyslexia, the common theme is that they struggled during their school years, and eventually overcame their challenges.  I worry that by getting my daughter accommodations I may be weakening her, and not forcing her to face her challenges.  This is sort of "what doesn't kill her will make her stronger" thinking, and I have chosen to take the opposite approach.  Eide explains throughout the book that dyslexia really can be an advantage in allowing the "afflicted" person to think in a way that is not obvious to others.  This allows them to see things in a different light, or think outside the box, without even trying.  However, Eide strongly recommends accommodations, and does not see them as impairing the dyslexic advantages, but only of giving those advantages a way to surface.

All told, The Dyslexic Advantage should join Overcoming Dyslexia:  A New and Complete Science- Based Program for Reading Problems at any Level  by Sally Shaywitz and From Emotions to Advocacy:  The Special Education Survival Guide by Pete Wright as required reading for the parents of any child with dyslexia.

This is one more down for the Support Your Library Challenge - 20 to go.

Next up on CD:  Helen of Troy by Margaret George.  This is 30 hours on 25 CDs!  I will be saying that I'm still listening to this one for at least the next month.

Still Reading:  A Watery Part of the World by Michael Parker

The Friends Book Report - 2

Last night the Friends Book Group met to discuss Left Neglected by Lisa Genova.  We were surprisingly harsh.  It seems that the Friends thought that the story all worked out a little too conveniently in the end, and that the side story about a child with ADHD felt contrived.

A few of the Friends had also read Still Alice by the same author, and found Alice  to be the more powerful book.  We decided that Alice had more of an impact on the reader because it is so much more likely that one of us would get early onset Alzheimer's than that one of us would get left neglect.  We also thought that it seemed like Genova had more experience with Alzheimer's, so she was able to show it to the reader more convincingly.

In terms of the narrative, I preferred Left Neglected, but that may be for the very reason that Alice was so powerful, and more than a little frightening.

Next up:  The Paris Wife by Paula McLain  This one was next up on my nightstand anyway, so I'm excited to read it!

Still Reading:  Little Bee by Chris Cleave

Still Listening to:  Swamplandia! by Karen Russell

The Missing Piece

Within days after I finished Still Alice by Lisa Genova, I was on the phone with my financial planner discussing disability insurance.  Still Alice is the story of an active, over educated woman, in the prime of her life, who develops early onset Alzheimer's disease.  What was really compelling about Alice was that the author, Lisa Genova, knew what she was talking about.  After all, she has a PhD in neuroscience from Harvard.  Genova managed to tell the story of Alice in a way that inspired compassion, and also educated the reader about the disease, while still keeping the story interesting. 

When The Friends Book Group decided to read Left Neglected by Genova, I wondered if I would be calling to increase my coverage.  Left Neglected is the story of Sarah, a super overachieving mother of three, whose life changes when she is in a car crash, and forgets that there is a left side of herself, or anything else.  Sounds bizarre, doesn't it?  As Sarah tries to explain her experience to her husband, the conversation goes like this: 

Sarah:  "Honey, tell me everything you see in here." 
Bob:  [names every item of furniture in the room]
Sarah:  "Is that everything?"
Bob:  "Pretty much"
Sarah:  "Okay, now what if I told you that everything you see is only half of everything that's really here?  What if I told you to turn your head and look at the other half?  Where would you look?"

Left Neglect is a real condition, which, as I understand it, is usually caused by brain trauma.  Left Neglected shows Sarah trying to conquer her neglect, both that in her brain, and that caused by her mother.  While it probably sounds like a medical story, it's really more of a story of a mom realizing that she was living a crazy life, and that she is more than her office persona. 

This book, like Still Alice, is a page turner.  Also, with a side story line of Sarah's struggles to face and manage her son's ADHD, it is a great book for Friends of Different Learners.  Now I just have to wait a month and 2 days to discuss it with them. 

For all you financial planners out there, here's an idea:  keep a few copies of both of Lisa Genova's books on hand and casually pass them out to clients who are on the fence about disability insurance.  Sales are likely to skyrocket!

Next up:  Contested Will by James Shapiro

Still listening to:  The Tale of Halcyon Crane by Wendy Webb